AHMADINEJAD OFFERS GIFT TO ISRAEL

JEWLARIOUS SATIRE: After he announced an "Easter gift" to England, releasing 15 naval officers illegally captured in Iraqi waters, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad announced a "Pre-Shavuous Gift to Israel" - a new peace initiative for the Middle East. Calling his plan a "trial balloon which we offer the vermin and infidels in the spirit of true brotherhood and understanding," Ahmadinejad offered, in his words, "a plan which Israel must accept or face complete annihilation."

At a Tehran-based Press Conference, Ahmadinejad unveiled his central tenet: "Israel must withdraw to the 586 B.C.E. borders when they were exiled from the land by our Babylonian cousins, and must allow all of the native sheep and goats displaced in any conflicts and their offspring to return."

Seated beside Ahmadinejad, UN Envoy to the Middle East, Alvaro de Soto, immediately applauded the plan, stating, "We see this as a constructive way forward. We admire the Iranian President's courage and his boldness in offering fresh and untested ideas." A testy Ahmadinejad continued, "I am not done yet and if you interrupt again, I will break your arm. We demand that as part of the peace process, Iran be allowed to make its nuclear weapons program operational and will use such weapons on any Israeli who returns." A cautious De Soto called the proposal, "reasonable and workable - ideas which will not change the daily life of any Israeli citizen." He then paused and added, "Please don't break my arm."

Rounding out his plan, Ahmadinejad added, "We demand that all the locusts and pestilence currently living in the land of Mohamed convert to Islam and stop pretending that the Holocaust happened. We require the country of Lucifer's children to change its name to 'Iran' and absolve itself of democracy. We insist that the Iron Shiek be recognized as the greatest WWF wrestler of all time and be placed on all coins and stamps circulating in the region." When pressed Ahmadinejad conceded that, if Israel met his conditions, Iran would consider normalizing relations with "Satan's earthly messengers of hell and damnation" within five to ten years.

In response to the Ahmadinejad Plan, Israeli Government Spokesman, Mark Regev, declared the plan, "absurd as can be" and added, "even the recognition of the Iron Shiek - the most logical point of the bunch -- is really a non-starter."

Danish President, Anders Fogh Rasmussen, then criticized Israel, stating, "This narrow-mindedness is typical of Israel. Why won't Israel change its name to Iran and give up all democratic rights for peace?" Norwegian Prime Minister Jens Stoltenberg added, "This could be an Iranian Oslo, but Israel just can't see the mutual benefits herein."

Embracing the plan, former President Jimmy Carter called for, "universal recognition and acceptance" and called on the Nobel Committee to award its Peace Prize to Ahmadinejad immediately. Carter added, "If they gave one to Arafat, how hard would it be to get Ahmadinejad one?"

Contacted in Syria, Bashar Assad added, "This plan is just crazy enough to work."

The original, and more funny stuff, can be found at: http://www.aish.com/jewlarious/

POOR OLD MUSLIMS

I received the following by email. After an unsuccessful search for the original author, I decided to publish it here anyway without recognition. It is too good to pass up and gives pause for thought.

TWISTED LOGIC - POOR OLD MUSLIMS - THEY GET INSULTED - WE GET BEHEADED

The Pope says that jihad violence is against God's nature, and officials fear that in response, Muslims enraged by this insult will commit... jihad violence.

Muslims murder 3,000 innocents in New York and expect no criticism.

Muslims murder 202 tourists in Bali and expect no criticism.

Muslims murder 333 schoolchildren and their teachers in Beslan and expect no criticism.

Muslims murder 292 innocents, mainly Kenyans and Tanzanians at two US Embassies and expect no criticism.

Muslims murder 241 US and 58 French peacekeepers in Beirut and expect no criticism.

Muslims fire 4,000 Katyusha rockets into Northern Israel killing over 50 innocent civilians and expect no criticism.

Muslims murder 52 in London and 191 in Madrid and expect no criticism.

Muslims murder 200 in Mumbai and expect no criticism.

Muslims behead Western hostages in Iraq, Buddhist monks in Thailand and Christian schoolgirls in Indonesia and expect no criticism.

Muslims murder 500,000 in Darfur and expect no criticism.

Muslims regard Jews as 'sons of pigs and monkeys', and vow to nuke Israel and expect no criticism.

Muslims force women to wear hideous sacks, they stone to death women for getting raped and for leaving the home unescorted (the woman in the picture is being partially burried before being stoned to death), engage in honor killings of sisters and daughters for unapproved dating, and expect no criticism.

Muslims danced in the streets and handed out sweets to their kids to celebrate the 9/11 atrocity, and still expected no criticism.

Since 9/11 Muslims have killed over 26 ,000 and wounded over 50,000 in terrorist attacks worldwide and expect no criticism.

Since 9/11 Muslims have committed terrorist attacks in Afghanistan, Algeria , Bangladesh, Belgium, Chad , Chechnya , Dagestan , Denmark , East Timor , Egypt , England , Eritrea , Ethiopia, France, Germany, India, Indonesia, Ingushetia, Iran, Iraq, Israel, Jordan, Jordan-Iraq, Kabardino-Balkans , Kenya , Kosovo , Kuwait , Kyrgyzstan , Lebanon , Mauritania , Morocco, etherlands, Nigeria , Pakistan , Gaza-Palestinian Authority, Philippines , Qatar , Russia, Saudi Arabia, Scotland, Somalia, Spain, Sri Lanka, Sudan, Syria, Tajikistan, Thailand, Tunisia, Turkey , United Arab Emirates , United Arab Republic , United States , Uzbekistan and Yemen, and still expect no criticism.

Muslims have carried out over 5,800 fatal terrorist atrocities since 9/11, and countless thousands since Islamic conquest began in 623 AD and expect no criticism.
But if a Pope dares to tell the truth about Islam or Danes publish cartoons about Mohammed, then let the outpourings of Islamic hate and outrage begin.

And, by some twisted reach of logic, these arrogant ______ demand the Pope issue an apology.

HOLOCAUST LEGACY - Lost Generations

HOLOCAUST LEGACY

Papa, where are my uncles and aunties?
Why weren’t they here for Chanukah?
Where were they at Pesach?
Will they come for Sukkot?
Why don’t I have cousins to play with?
Where is Savtah and Sabba?
(Grandmother and Grandfather)
Momma, why is our family so small?

As a child, a small family was normal. However, growing older I began to notice other families, especially during holidays and special occasions, had aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents crowed into houses and spilling out onto front lawns. As an adult I tried to trace my family roots in Poland but always hit dead ends.

Running into dead end after dead end was discouraging. There was only one place where I could find results, Holocaust victim’s lists. Inputting our family name into Holocaust Internet sites produced several pages of those, with our family name, who were murdered in the camps. This is my legacy. Unfortunately, this situation is not uncommon in the world Jewish population.

There has been much written about the children of Holocaust survivors but relative little about descended, and extended, families of Holocaust victims. The absence of family, especially around holidays and special times, is a real loss. Listed below is a small list of some of the resources available on the Internet. From these resources, links to others may be found.


http://www.geocities.com/athens/delphi/7279/
ONE-STOP site to find all other Second and Third Generation Holocaust Survivor Groups

http://www.judymeschel.com/cosh.htm
Resources for Children of Holocaust Survivors

http://www.missing-identity.net/
Missing Identity Website

http://www.judymeschel.com/coshorgs.htm
Resources for Children of Holocaust Survivors

http://remember.org/children/tracing.html
Tracing Family Members Lost in the Holocaust

Google Searches
Children of holocaust survivors
Descendants of holocaust survivors

Yom Hashoah - Teaching New Generations

Hall of Names, was inaugurated March 15 2005, at Yad Vashem Holocaust Memorial, in Jerusalem


This coming Sunday and Monday, April 15 and 16, Jewish communities around the world will gather to mark Yom Hashoah, the day set aside as Holocaust Remembrance Day. Why do we want to remember one of the most terrible chapters in human history when over 11 million people were murdered, 6 million of which were Jews, by the Nazis? We remember so that it will never happen again.

The challenge isn't to establish what happened during those terrible times. We know what happened, we know the facts. Today's challenge is to educate a world of Holocaust deniers and to educate new generations. By knowing our human capacity for great evil, and knowing what has happened because of it, perhaps we can stop it before it happens again.

And yet it is happening again all around the world. In Darfur, Bosnia, Rwanda, in the call of Jihad by some to wipe Israel off the map and eliminate the Jewish population of the world, and in other small ways. In the U.K., schools are dropping Holocaust education for fear that Britain's rising Muslim population will take offense. If indeed it is true that "those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it," we have very real cause for alarm today - making observance of Holocaust Remembrance Day all the more important.

6 million people were brutally murdered during the Holocaust just for being born as Jews. It is an abomination when any group or ideology determines to commit genocide on another group. We must not forget and we must continue to teach it, complete with depictions of the gore and atrocities that occurred.

If you are a teacher, whatever you teach, I invite you to take some time this Monday, April 16, to talk about it to all of your classes, to take a moment of silence in "remembrance." I invite everyone to ask this question: Can we really sit back in our comfortable lives and do nothing when atrocities are happening, or about to happen, in different places around the world? I challenge you to discuss, or think about, ways in which you can make a difference. I invite you to forward this to colleagues, friends and family so they may also participate.

Bush Threatens Sanctions Against Ahmadinejad

I've written before that the news never changes. One might go so far as to say a great deal of it is 'cookie cutter journalism." That, of course, is not to put down all of the fine journalists out there who work so hard to get truly objective nonbiased news. However, I think for much of the news, one just needs to pull something out of archives, almost anything really, change a few names, a few places, a few "facts," and amazingly there is today's latest.

That said, I was in deep contemplation of this when the following floated across my computer screen. Falling down, down, down into the pit of my deep seated feelings that there is not enough laughter in the world, I had to share this with you. Enjoy!












Bush: Ahmadinejad Must Dismantle Last Name
Threatens Sanctions Against Polysyllabic Leader

The war of words between the United States and Iran heated up today as President George W. Bush demanded that Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad dismantle his last name or face serious sanctions.

Speaking from the Rose Garden at the White House, Mr. Bush made it clear that he believed Mr. Ahmadinejad’s possession of a difficult-to-pronounce, polysyllabic last name was a provocative act that the United States was not prepared to tolerate.

“The time has come for the Iranian president to make a choice,” Mr. Bush warned. “Does he want to continue down this dangerous, polysyllabic path, or does he want to join the community of peace-loving, monosyllabic world leaders?”

Under a plan being floated through diplomatic channels, Mr. Ahmadinejad’s last name would be subject to U.N. inspections and then dismantled syllable by syllable, ultimately
to be stored in a secure U.S. military facility in Tennessee.

Mr. Bush’s warning to President Ahmadinejad predictably garnered the support of several of his monosyllabic counterparts, such as Britain’s Tony Blair, South Korea’s Roh Moo Hyun and the Czech Republic’s Václav Klaus.

But his strong rhetoric was less warmly received by members of the so-called “polysyllabic movement,” led by Equatorial Guinea’s President Teodoro Obiang Nguema Mbasogo.

“We in the polysyllabic movement were offended by the president’s remarks,” Mr. Mbasogo said. “If Mr. Bush can pronounce the word ‘polysyllabic,’ he should have no problem with ‘Ahmadinejad.’”

Elsewhere, U.S. software mogul Charles Simonyi said that he agreed to pay $25 million to travel on board the Russian Soyuz TMA-10 spaceship only after repeatedly failing to travel on JetBlue.

From: Borowitzreport.com/

THE GREATEST LIE - DENIAL

In the Old City of Jerusalem I spent some time speaking with the owner of one of the shops in the Christian Quarter. He was a Palestinian Arab who spoke excellent English and seemed well educated. I was curious to know what the pulse and beliefs of the common people there were concerning world issues. What I heard was astounding. He believed, this well dressed educated man, in what he told me.

Although he had a lot to say when he decided I was really interested in his opinion, he elaborated on three main things. First, "... it is a known fact that on the morning of 9/11, 4000 Jews did not show up for work at the Twin Towers." Second, "9/11 was a joint plan carried out together by the Israelis and Americans." And third, "Yassar Arafat had offered peace and both Israel and America refused it." Use you imagination just a little and you will begin to see the problem here.

It is absolutely amazing that those people fully believe these things. Now, one of the newer lies to surface is Holocaust Denial on a large scale. While it has been around since the end of WW II, it is now being perpetrated on a world wide basis... and people believe it.

Of course, we know about the recent conference in Iran that met to deny the Holocaust. There was a tiny outcry, almost a whimper, immediately following the conference. Now, however, the world had gone mostly silent. WHAT IS WRONG WITH US THAT WE DO NOT SPEAK UP?

When people hear their professors, politicians, holy men. news commentators, and many others all saying the Holocaust is a lie they believe it. Here is just a brief taste of the lies they are telling. Please give this video feed a short time to load before watching it.